MY ANSWER TO: ACT LIKE A LADY THINK LIKE A MAN
To assume that one man can speak for all men is too presumptuous. It borders on arrogance. I read the book by Steve Harvey several years ago when it first came out. As a daughter I think what he delivers (advice) is admirable. I wish I could have had those conversations with my own Father. But one size does not fit all.
Some of the things he says made perfect sense. Others are predicated on the notion that every man approaches life and relationships in the same manner. A man who was raised in a two-parent home is going to think totally differently than a man who was raised by a single Mother, or single parent. Having a Father in the home is going to make him a different man. The way he treats a woman will be completely different. As human beings we learn by example. Hard to miss what you haven’t had. Remember I’m the one that proposed “Can a Woman Raise a Boy to be a Man?” (http://tellittovenus.blogspot.com/2010/03/can-woman-raise-boy-to-be-man.html). It’s even harder to give what you don’t get.
Sounds like I’m being a critic, but actually I’m a fan. I have watched The Steve Harvey Show faithfully. I’ve seen him fix women up and bring couples closer together. But I still contend that the essence of any man can’t be summed and put into a nice neat package. To think every man and his thought process can be evaluated so simply is to discount his upbringing and life experiences.
Common sense ain’t that common. Love you Steve, but you don’t have all the answers. You are not an authority on relationships. Interestingly, your former bodyguard Big Boom (also a former pimp) wrote a book on relationships before you entitled “If You Want Closure in Your Relationship Start with Your Legs”. I have often wondered if he inspired you to pen your own book. I understand that you wrote the book for your daughters, but I can’t help but feel he had some influence.
Sounds simple and direct, but it’s easier to apply than your home-spun advice that is contingent on every man having the same approach and thought process. I contend it’s just not that simple. Men tend to be just as complex as women. It’s human nature. If it was that simple there would be a lot more happy relationships and happily married couples, and a lot less lonely people.
If I applied your logic and thought as you I’d be alone with a good read; not necessarily by choice. As my alter-ego Venus I have expressed one continuing theme; men and women want the same thing, to be happy and find love. There is no tried and true formula to get there. I can’t pretend to know the mind of a man. I appreciate your insight, but I’m better off without the games, the rules and pretense to just be the woman I am.