WHAT UP BITCHES?!

If we use the term in a derogatory manner then how can it inexplicably be a term of endearment? Blessings and curses can’t come out of the same mouth. One minute I’m touting what a “bad bitch” you are the next I’m just calling you a bitch. Something is missing in translation.

We have heard women greet each other with this phrase as if it’s normal salutation. We treat this greeting as if we said, “Hello.”, or “Good to see you.”

When this becomes the norm we’ve crossed a line. Or is it just a cry that our vocabulary needs to improve? We’ve been told that using profanity is a sign of a lack of an extensive vocabulary. You remember. You’ve heard your mother and grandparents tell you this time and time again. Simple truth in an old wives’ tell.

We continually degrade each other as if there’s humor in calling each other names. I’ve even done it in my own family. Whatever we were fixated on became the running joke. For example we were calling each other names like ice cream ho, video game ho, the list goes on and on. You can fill in the blanks. Now that I’m admitted it it’s not so funny. Nobody is laughing.

There are so many slang words women use to refer to each other, but when a man says it we claim to be objectified, or insulted by a rapper’s rhyme. If women say this to each other then why is there a problem when men say it to us? It’s the same principle as using the “n” word amongst black people and there being an outcry when a non-black uses the same word.

I’m very proud of the women in my family. Educated, articulate, driven, ambitious; they’ve worked too hard to establish themselves for someone to call them out of their name. When I think of them I don’t see a ho, slut, bitch, chicken head, or a whore. These are doctors, lawyers, professional women who have graduated from the top schools and made something of themselves. In the case of my Mother; she was instrumental in creating the Black Student Association at Northwestern University. That certainly doesn’t qualify as a bitch to me.

In proper terms “bitch” is a female dog, but even Webster’s sites the word as profanity. Next time you hear that word hopefully it’s not coming out of your mouth. If someone else is using the term as profanity gently correct them in love. I’m not going to call another woman out of her name again. This is not a term of endearment. Out of anger I’ve used that word. Maybe it was complete frustration. Before you let the word roll off your tongue think about someone calling you the word. Say it as if you’re saying to your Mother, your daughter, your Grandmother….you probably won’t say it. As a friend commented on my Facebook; a man doesn’t want a “bad bitch” he wants a good woman.

Talk To Her by India Arie When you talk to her talk to her Like you'd want somebody a Talk to your mama Don't get smart with her Have a heart to heart With her just like you Would with your daughter Cause everything you do or say You got to live with every day She's somebody's baby She's somebody's sister She's somebody's mama

It doesn't matter if She's wearing mini a skirt or business suit Whether she's twenty-five or ninety-nine Treat her the way your mama taught you to She could be the queen of Sheba, she could be a school teacher A homemaker or lawyer I think it's good for your karma If when you talk to her

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