IT'S JUST SEX



Those are three words that can kill or begin a relationship. Some relationships end because they’re not having sex while others begin because all they do is have sex. Too many people equate sex with love. For most women we see sex as a sign of commitment. For other others it means absolutely nothing, but getting off in that moment. Are people still having sex on the first date? Even in the wake of HIV/AIDS, STDS, and things I can’t pronounce; people are still having unprotected sex. Why? I don’t pretend to know the answer. I do know everyone wants to feel wanted and loved and sex does release those endorphins that make us feel loved.

As a woman and entrepreneur mistakenly my sisters before me have used it in trade. Why else would a businessman have the audacity to ask me for sex as part of their incentive package? You have no idea how disgusting I find that. Speaking about it I need a shower. There’s not enough money in the world! Just like pork bellies and oil are traded on the open market; so is sex.

There’s a part of me that wonders if this is the price we pay for the ever-changing roles that women take on. Is it that difficult for men not to objectify women? Is this the costs of doing business? We all know that one woman who has slept her way to the top. She’s the same one that we see as V.P. at our company, or the starlet that seems to have it all. But at what cost? There’s always a price.

Sex can kill or sex can give life. The very act that can be sacred and beautiful can be nasty and dirty. The act of “making love” can bring us closer to the object of our affection. Effing can get us off in the moment and fill us with remorse and regret. What was done in the dark we hope never sees the light of day. How many have woken up next to someone they never want to see again….all this done to escape the loneliness of the night. How many have based an entire relationship on sex? Men have been known to say all kinds of things in the heat of the moment. Just as he climaxes, “Oh, I love you.” Why don’t women get that? You could be anybody at that moment.

Sex changes things. There are some of us that have a nonchalant attitude about the whole thing. Others see it as a sacred act to be shared with the one we love. After all it’s just sex. An act that forever binds us to another. Every time we are intimate we give someone a piece of ourselves. How many times and people do we share ourselves with before there’s nothing left?

We lay down with someone we love not knowing that we’ve just signed our death certificate. We lay down to get off not knowing that that single act has connected us with this person for the next 18 years; for life. Trading our one moment of pleasure and ecstasy for a lifetime of misery. Being connected to someone you don’t even like, nor respect. This is someone you don’t know. This is some random chick, some random guy that you would have never chosen to be the mother or father of your child. We lay down not knowing that what we thought was exclusive is being shared. We lay down not knowing that what we share can never lead to a commitment because they’re already committed to someone else. Once given it can’t be taken back. After all it’s just sex.

Sex that can be beautiful, emotional, tender, gentle and just downright good; especially when there’s passion. Sex is the same act that as intimate as it is can be impersonal, faceless, nameless, and empty. Yeah there’s that one who can rock your world, but never would they be a part of your life. After all it’s just sex.


“The cheap becomes expensive.”(Old Spanish Saying) – What costs are too high to pay?






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